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Former Godfather’s Pizza CEO May Set off Pizza War

This week  Herman Cain, an American businessman, political activist, columnist, and  host from  Georgia, announced his candidacy for the Republican nomination for President.  The Republican’s ”great black hope” to challenge President Obama is  best known as the former CEO of Godfather’s Pizza chain.  According to wikipedia which has a rather extensive entry on Herman Cain, Cain  burnished his chops as a businessman after graduating from Morehouse College and obtaining a Masters in Computer Science from Perdue University and a stint working for the U.S. Navy, by going to work for the Coca Cola Company as a business analyst before landing at  Pillsbury Foods where he rose to Vice President, managed 400 plus Philadelphia area Burger Kings, restoring profitability. It was in his subsequent role as CEO role of the Godfather’s Pizza chain which he also restored to profitability and then with a group of investors buying it outright from Pillsbury that helped elevate his standing as a business leader. It was, however,  his confrontation of President Clinton on the Health Care debate that launched him into the national spotlight, link here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXSVz_8-7ms

Herman Cain’s announcement has set off a chain reaction across the Eastern seaboard of the United States from New York City up through New England, generally considered the corridor for the best tasting Pizza in America. The CEO of Lombardi’s Pizza in Soho is rumored to be close to announcing his own candidacy for President to challenge the Godfather’s Pizza executive.   Given his family pedigree and vast experience  an in actually making and over seeing a superior Pizza generally ranked among the best if not the best in New York City; one that uses real genuine Italian ingredients and looks, tastes and smells like genuinely good Pizza, the Lombardi’s owner poses a serious threat to Cain should he decide to run. Many believe his distate and distrust of Cain lies squarely on the fact that a guy who ran a Pizza chain that no legitimate Italian American would actually order a slice from, unless he was outside of New York, may actually end up setting American Pizza policy and thereby reducing quality, taste and character of the overall Pizza for the sake of efficiency and to otherwise achieve his greater political ambition.

The Lombardi’s of Soho owner was over heard stating: “Look, its sort of like making President a guy who makes $3.00 sauce in a jar? We are not talking RAO’s, capische?  I too could take Heinz  Ketchup, add a few lumps, a bit of water and call it sauce but I don’t.  My grandma is from the old country, it would be embarrassing.  He continued, “Are we ready for a President who thinks popping a frozen Ellio’s Pizza in his toaster oven is like taking a trip to the old country?  Or will he be ordering in to the White House, Godather’s or Domino’s from an 800 number? Are we ready for that?  The freaking guys uniforms are Red, White & Blue. Take a look at the Italian flag and tell me what colors you see. MING!”

No disrespect,  Domino’s and Godfather’s make a nice Pizza if your name is Steve and your from Nebraska.  Overheard at Patsy’s Pizzeria on 116th Street, the place that the Chairman of the Board got his Pizza slice on, was a conversation at the bar by a group of Italian-Americans from the neigborhood going something like this:  We get it, bread, tomatoes and cheese tastes pretty good together. Bada Bing!!  Truth be told if I was camping in Appalachia and did not have my grandmother’s gravy recipe handy or some fresh tomatoes, I might use my cell and call a Domino’s.” His buddy chimed in: 

 ”America is far  too great a country to have in the White House a man who ran a Pizza chain whose sauce tastes similar perhaps to a high quality ketchup.  It takes a paisan more than just a man who throws the pies on.”

The general feeling among the Pizza cognoscenti is that if America is gonna have as its President a man who ran a Pizza place, it should be at least be someone from a place like Patsy’s Pizzeria on 116th street, the place where the Chairman of the Board got his Pizza on, Lombardi’s of Soho or maybe even Grimaldi’s in Brooklyn. And if not from one of those from one of the two families in New Haven, Connecticut, Federal Hill in Providence, Rhode Island or the North End of Boston. Or at least from a local joint in Bensonhurst or Bay Ridge. I mean not even Tony Manero in Saturday Night Fever was never seen strutting in or out of   a Domino’s.  Do you really think Frank Sinatra would endorse a $3.00 sauce, or a guy who makes frozen pizza’s for the supermarket? Fugghedaboutit!! Turst me,  I do not think he would be voting for Herman Cain.

America’s Pizza Values Under Attack?
 
When we pushed the owners from the Five Pizza Families on why their problem with the Herman Cain candidacy, all we got was “Geez you are freaking killing me here.  Does this Mama Luc even know from fresh mozzarella?”  In the debates will the guy from PBS, referring presumably to the moderator, even know to ask that question? You feeling me here? They are building this guy up like he is the freaking Ray Kroc of Pizza, which he is not.  A representative from one of the Five Pizza Families lamented “maybe  he should come to New York, New Haven or Providence taste what actual tomato sauce tastes like and then go back and shut down Godfather’s Pizza and withdraw from his Presidential campaign until he learns how to make a decent sauce. That’s all I am saying.”  He might even take a trip down to New York’s Lower East Side into Ally’s place The Pizza Shack where  the Pizza is made with San Marzano tomato gravy, mamma mia!

When we asked finally about the merits of Cain’s experience bringing back Godfather’s Pizza from bankruptcy, we got a few chuckles and eye rolls and then the following statement from a public relations representative from the Italian-American Pizza League and the International Brotherhood of Pizza makers:   ”On one level it is a good thing, he has allowed folks to keep their jobs making and selling what he believes to be Pizza, but  it still looks a tad bankrupt if you ask me: http://godfathers.com/

“This Pizza should sleep with the fishes, unless your name is Steve and you are from Nebraska”, exclaimed yet another. I know some of these joints may even have some Italian-American heritage but take a look at what Godfather’s is making today vs. the genuine article found at places like Lombardi’s, Patsy’s of 116th Street, Pepe’s Pizza of New Haven etc.”  In a statement from a representative of of one of the New York families: “America’s Pizza values are under attack.” He continues: “We must resist the temptation offered by the puveyors of greater efficiency in the making of Pizza and seek moderation or before you know it we may vote for President the guy who thinks he is making Pizza when he schmeers some sauce and throws a slice of cheese on top of an english muffin after a drunken night out on the town.”  He suggested that we look at the following list of Pizzeria’s for the type of Pizza making leadership America needs “now more than ever”:

Pizza in NYC & the Northeast

NYC

Lombardi’s Pizza: http://www.firstpizza.com/
Patsy’s Pizzeria 116th Street: http://www.thepatsyspizza.com/
Grimaldi’s Pizza: http://www.grimaldis.com/
Di Farra Pizza: http://www.difara.com/
Pulino’s Pizza: http://www.pulinosny.com/
Pizza Shack:   http://pizzashacknyc.com/
Alba Pizza: http://www.albapizza.com
Artichoke Pizza: http://www.artichokepizza.com/
Ray Bari Pizza: http://www.raybaripizza.com

New Haven

Pepe’s Pizza: http://www.pepespizzeria.com/
Sallys Apizza: http://sallysapizza.com/default.aspx
New Haven Pizza: http://thepauperedchef.com/2007/09/new-haven-pizza.html

Boston
Regina Pizzeria: http://www.pizzeriaregina.com

Providence, Rhode Island

Bob & Timmy: http://www.bobandtimmys.com/
Caserta Pizzeria: http://casertapizzeria.com/

More on Herman Cain

Herman Cain: http://www.hermancain.com/
Herman Cain (wikipedia): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herman_Cain
Herman Cain Isn’t Legitimate Presidential Candidate: http://blogs.ajc.com/jay-bookman-blog/2011/05/17/herman-cain-isnt-legitimate-presidential-candidate/
The Republicans Find A Black Man (CCT): http://www.capecodtoday.com/blogs/index.php/2011/05/21/the-republicans-found-a-black-man?blog=89
The Republicans Find A Black Man (Plymouth Daily News): http://plymouthdailynews.com/republicans-find-black-man-13845

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