I want your love and
I want your revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
I want your love and
All your lover’s revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
Tiger Woods is on the verge of becoming the first professional athlete to earn a billion dollars in winnings and endorsements. Woods is estimated to have earned approximately $750 million dollars since he began his professional career in 1996. In 2008 alone he earned $110 million dollars. As a multicultural athlete and the premier player in the game of gentleman his celebrity is certainly international making him a truly global sports icon. He is married to the beautiful Elin Nordegren who has born him two children Charlie born in February of this year and Sam born in 2007. With so much on the line, the last thing Tiger Woods needs now is to be “caught in a bad romance”, stuck on the 19th hole. One can only hope that the rumors are false that Tiger Woods is having an affair with Nightclub Queen, Rachel Uchitel who has worked as a VIP hostess to the stars in Las Vegas, the Hamptons and Manhattan, most recently at Griffin in the meatpacking district. In America we are protective of our icons and heroes and saddened to see them become just another cliche. Some say that is the human condition due to the imperfections of man. I disagree and refuse to accept the inevitability of this type of bad conduct.
The Cardinal Rule: If your wife is loyal, supportive, enabling your success from a platform of security and bears your children, you don’t go off course (say to the Pink Elephant) looking for the 19th hole, even if she is pretty and her name is Rachel Uchitel. You either (a) grant her a divorce on equal and favorable terms (b) suggest an open marriage affording her the the same opportunity or (c) file for divorce and hire an independent professional companion to keep your extra marital relations in the shadows (permanently). You do not humiliate your wife in public. Try to remember, that you are a public figure and she is the mother of your children.
Truth: The truth is that far too many men make the same tragic mistake of getting involved with the wrong women at the most inopportune times in their life. The history books as well as the pop cultural landscape are filled with them. Romantic commitment, especially life partnership(s) based on marriage is extraordinarily complex and challenging, certainly a curvy road with many twists and turns. Marriage is not always easy. Sacrifice is part of the equation and with the narcissism epidemic, the me generation may have a harder time with sacrificing their interim personal pleasure for the greater good of their partners and their partnerships. A further truth, however, is that many men overlook the great women in their lives once they have reeled them in, got them to commit, married and domesticated them turning them into Suzy homemaker. Perhaps it is human nature to overlook that which you already possess. In domesticity there is a tendency to overlook the independence, sex appeal and yearning you once had for a woman who is engaged in the ultimate sacrifice of providing a support structure to your life. It’s as if it this is god’s bad joke on the nature of man that we suffocate and reign in the independent spirit of women and once they are caged as a homemaker we go out and look once again for what? A woman who is everything we once admired in our wife, girlfriend or life partner in the first place. Sad. It makes no sense. And yet, I know this and I am the one without the life partner while others are out there making the same mistakes day after day, appearing on TMZ and the National Enquirer reeking havoc on their own lives and that of their families. All I know is that when you wife feels the need to take a golf club to your head while you drive off and crash your Cadillac Escalade into a fire hydrant and or a tree, something is truly busted. Keep in mind that chances are if you are feeling the need for something fresh and new, your partner might likely be feeling the same way. Women who sacrifice their freedom to indulge their id and refrain from hedonistic indulgence in pursuit of the pleasure principle, for the sake of love, security and trust being provided for by their partner, may not always necessarily be as happy as you might imagine, and they may also be desirous of an infusion of creative sensual energy, from time to time, to sustain themselves. And if you are out there looking for the 19th hole while ignoring her needs you risk turning her into a desperate housewife.
Sex: Some say that infidelity is never just about the sex. I am reminded of the scene in When Harry Met Sally where Harry Burns (played by Billy Crystal) and his buddy Jess (played by Bruno Kirby) are at the GIANTS game at the Meadowlands in New Jersey discussing how Harry found out his wife was cheating on him with “Ira” and planning to leave him.
Jess: Marriages do not break up on account of infidelity. Its just a symptom that something else is wrong.
Harry: Oh really? Well, that symptom is _ucking my wife!!
So in the end whether or not it is just about the sex, if your existential crisis makes it inevitable that you find a different companion, one would be wise to consider the services of a Professional VIP Companion. Elite Professional Companions are a safer bet, especially if you are going through an existential crisis and not sure if leaving your wife is the end game. This is safer than getting involved with another public persona, especially one in the nightclub business because in the end, despite her assurances to the contrary that she will not go public with her story, the next thing you know she will hire celebrity attorney Gloria Allred while the story is leaked to the National Enquirer and then play itself out in the mainstream media, subjecting your wife and family to humiliation.
Avoiding the Male Cliche: So, you have gone out and had the affair. You could not avoid puttering around the 19th hole. Maybe you even think you are truly “in love” with the other woman. You are even considering leaving your wife. O.K. Then you must sit down and work out an exit strategy before the story of your infidelity goes public, upon which you will lose any and all leverage, credibility and authority to craft or negotiate an amicable resolution. If you don’t spare her the anguish of learning of your indiscretion other than via your own confession, you deserve a golf club to the head. If you continue to pursue sexual thrills while leaving your partner in the dark until she learns of it through a third party or the media, then that makes you a narcissistic selfish idiot (See: A-Rod vs. C-Rod). So, while I expect that a woman who has experience in the spotlight will rush to the klieg lights much like a moth goes to the light, you can expect that Team Woods will hunker down, work on their situation and get their stories straight. Mistresses do not always understand that when a man and wife are sitting atop a billion dollar empire, it pays for them to put forth a united front so that the alleged “other woman” does not get a piece or the alleged infidelity itself does undermine the value of the empire, especially one tied to the perceived morality of the man atop the empire. So expect like even A-Rod eventually gave up the strippers or at least his public displays with them, and turned away from Madonna, I would be surprised if Tiger did not do the same leaving Rachel Uchitel out in the cold to fend for herself. So while he plays a gentleman’s game, good manners at this point require this regardless of what the truth is. Although what is interesting in terms of Rachel Uchitel, who lives in New York City and who claims to be trying to play down and dismiss rumors of the affair but she does what? She flies to Los Angeles to meet with celebrity “feminist” attorney Gloria Allred. Last I checked New York also has attorneys. Excuse me if I nod off briefly until the other cliche shoe falls from the tree. Wake me when Rachel Uchitel appears on Larry King Live with her attorney to advise America of her signing an agreement with Harper Collins to publish her tell all book. At which point Tiger Woods & Company behind the scenes will write her a seven figure check to maintain her silence so as not to unsettle the billion dollar empire. In the end, “allegedly” messing with affluent married men and getting a “feminist” lawyer to represent you pays better than pitching bottle service at The Pink Elephant.